Why I left your bitchy Facebook mom group

I am a member of a handful of mom groups on Facebook and I am loving how they have the ability to connect women and new moms and old moms and just all these women who may otherwise feel alone in a forum format.

These groups act as a sounding board for info for everything from sex after childbirth to ‘holy shit where is the Tylenol my husband just said the dumbest most outrageous thing I have ever heard and I want to punch him in the face‘ to how to get rid of your child’s pacifier dependence (still looking for tips of anyone has any crazy ideas.)

Since I belong to quite a few, I have seen the good and the bad sides to these groups. There are the breastfeeding groups, the baby wearing groups, the new mom groups, the working moms groups, the cannabis moms, the naughty moms, the photography moms, etc. And they all seem to attract a different crowd of moms. They are fucking great.

The one I can’t stand though is the gaggle of moms that think anyone who disagrees with them or acts a bit more modest is a prude or they are acting “better than” them. From what I can tell, they are often the younger moms who feel the need to act bitchy to show they are good mothers.

Let me clarify that I had my first kid at 20 years old and was breastfeeding for my wild 21st birthday bash and I am NOT the best or most traditional mom. I curse, I lose my cool, I wanted to cry when Joss outgrew her onesie that said “I’m with the MILF”. I could easily fit into the bitchy young moms group but fuck that. Since I am a young mom, I get how hard it can be to be a fucking mom, how nothing you ever do is right or fair or what the fuck ever.

My boyfriend asks me why I don’t just leave the groups when they start trashing other moms and honestly I guess I am just so in awe about how ridiculous this shit can get. There is one group in particular that has more drama than I have ever seen. And not even good ‘get the popcorn‘ drama but ‘how the hell do you care about this enough to waste your time on it?‘ drama.

The admins of all people will screenshot arguments from other posts and share them again, tagging the person and taunting them to defend themselves. They will gang up on someone for having a concern about a carseat and how loose it was in a photo. They will call people names and threaten them, claiming they should ‘just die because no one will care.‘ And women in this group will share dick pics to prove their husband is 13 inches which will then be screenshot and deleted by the admins. But don’t worry if you missed it, just message the admins, they will send it to you.

I mean really people? What the fuck? And when you finally get so sick of all of the petty, childish bullshit drama and make a post about why they are losing yet another follower, they will mock you the whole time and put your post in their “pathetic exit speech” album where they will continually mock you, call you names and inevitably start some other dramatic fight that will spin off into another post.

I just want these groups to go back to their normal selves.

I want to know I’m not the only one who has accidentally shot my boyfriend in the eyes when my milk lets down during sex, (sorry hun.)

I want to talk about the best budgeting tips and how your husband is yet another man who thinks the coffee table is magical and cleans itself.

I want to help encourage moms through the hard times and congratulate them on the good times.

I want these bitchy fucking cunts to get over themselves and stop being such nasty people.

This world needs more love and we have to start the trend. Help me out folks. We may be Shitty Housewives but we aren’t shitty people.


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