Lookin’ Shitty


Here is the thing. I don’t mind working out.

I really don’t. I always feel so much better afterwards, I have tons of energy and I overall know I look better.

As far as eating healthy, I enjoy that too. Healthy tastes yummy, it’s fulfilling and of course it is so much better for you than processed foods.

I have worked out and eaten well my entire life. I always have a gym membership and I have continuously kept my weight down. BUT… (of course there is a but, this is The Shitty Housewife…) that shit is getting hard. It just is. After waking up and dealing with day to day life, keeping up with work and school and kids and chores, going to the gym has just become an annoyance. I still eat healthy. Obviously, from other posts, you all know I drink beer and chow queso, but I do eat healthy the majority of the time.

I know finding time in your day for yourself is so important and good for you, blah, blah, blah. But when I get some free time at any moment, I just want to lay in my comfortable bed, alone, in the quiet, BY MY FUCKING SELF, RESTING, and not on some elliptical machine or some spin class.

I am just over it. And the worst part about it is that now I am old and I actually have to REALLY try. In my early twenties I would feel fat one day, go jog for 30 minutes and wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am, looked like a million bucks again. Now, it takes weeks and weeks. I busted my ass after my third child. I worked out like a maniac. I got the weight off quickly, got super toned and on my wedding day, I was almost too skinny. But that stopped. Once life was back to the daily grind I lost interest.

Look, I want to feel good and look better. I want to get checked out by young boys. I want my husband to see other men check me out and be proud that I am his. I want to be the MILF. I want to look in the mirror and think “damn girl.” But all of those wants aren’t making it happen.

Here is my plea…help me readers. Give me some tips. Some advice. I need something more than just looking at pictures of Jennifer Aniston and Kate Hudson at this point. Although, their abs are motivating, lets be realistic here. I don’t have their time, chefs, trainers or MONEY. (If I did, I would probably just have a more comfortable bed and this would be even more challenging.)

What is your workout routine and why do you like it? How do you keep yourself motivated? How do I say no to early bedtime and yes to a quick night work out? How do I rewire my brain to love my body more than my bed? I am making an internet vow that by next week at this time I will have found something. Then I will do it in front of you all (not literally, I will just give you updates. You watching me workout would be too embarrassing, even for me!) I will keep track, tell you how it is going and let you know when I fuck up and stay in bed (but in bed with my husband doesn’t count because that sure as hell burns calories.)

Maybe keeping my word will be motivation enough.

Probably not, lets not get our hopes up.

Again, this is The Shitty Housewife. Dropping the ball is kinda my thing.

8 thoughts on “Lookin’ Shitty

    • Eric says:

      You should be able to nogotiate with LA Fitness for about $35 per month with no contract or upfront fee. However the best deal is, if you purchase 2 years up front they give you the 3rd year for free. Works out to $22 per monthe over a 3 year period. But you do have to pay upfront. All classes including yoga and body sculpting classes are inclided, both popular with the ladies.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Eric says:

    Jan, I totally hear ya. When my single friends with no kids complain, “omg, I am so busy!” I tell them they don’t know what busy is. And just wait it gets worse. Wait until you have to drive each child to a different activity, in a different location, every day. We just have to more cognicent of using our time efficiently. What motivates me are my two friends Jason and Becki. They have 6 kids. Yes, I said it…6! and some how they find time to get to the gym, go to yoga and run. They operate at a very high level. I am no saying uts easy but certainly not impossoble. They are probably the most in shape couple I know. If they can do it, we have no excuses.

    The gym is the most satisfying part of my day. It has become addictive. My body feels and looks better, my mind is right, I sleep better and I handle stress easier. I cant tell you how much i enjoy it. In this crazy world this is the one thing that is mine.

    My advice is this:

    1. Just do it. The hardest part is getting started the quality of the workout will come. Don’t obsess about what to do just get there. Buy a cute workout outfit. If you look good you will feel good. If you look cute noone will notice if you are doing an exercise wrong.
    2. Once you are doing it don’t stop. Inertia, things in motion tend to stay in motion. Trust me, once you are doing it you will be more motivated to be putting the right things in your body and you will be more likely to read about better ways to work out and eat.
    3. Find a partner. Talk to someone that also enjoys working out. Find someone that has common goals and that is a positive influence. Maybe someone that has kids and still looks incredible.
    4. Block out time. If you are wondering how to do that, try to at least workout Saturday and Sunday. Then you only need to squeeze in one or two days during the week. Schedule it like you would schedule a doctors appointment. Put it on your calendar and hold yourself accountable.
    5. Workout together. Couples that play together stay together. Some exercises can be tantalizing. Working out creates endorphins. Have fun with that.

    BTW you are already an 8 or 9. Good luck on getting to be a 10.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Amy says:

    Do you like to swim? I steal away to LA Fitness for the pool. It’s quiet, it literally maxes out at 3 other human beings in the room with you (huge plus for a busy mama), and you can kick your own ass while relaxing in under in under 45 minutes.

    Liked by 1 person

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